Saturday, April 21, 2012

Discrimination in the Community College

I had an interview yesterday at the Community College I was trying to attend and recorded the ENTIRE conversation. I am hard of hearing so I have that in there as well. The whole point of the conversation is to "determine" why I was NOT accepted into their small, puny college. I took the ATB test for students who do not have a GED or HSD. I missed my HSD by three points. Thanks, Secondary Schooling. You've been a wonderful help in my foster home days.

Anyway, I passed their ATB test which is basically a 24 credit program. At first they denied ever accepting Ability to benefit tests at all. Then the woman went on to say I never took the ATB test. I whipped it out of my bag and showed her that I took it.  Then she went to say, I need to take it again. I then whipped out my computer to show her that information she is relating is false By dept of ed. She read it over asked for a copy then said, "This is all new to us" Was her excuse. I know the real reason, she doesn't want another negro attending her school.

She repeatedly try covering her tracks by saying, "We want you to attend school..." And so on and so forth. I recorded the conversation. I need a second opinion. I need a lawyer, an activist who handles educational discrimination. Anyway, She said to me she will need to discuss this with her boss on Monday. To determine if this is acceptable. She said also that they do not have Sign language classes in their school but then signed me up for classes that have sign language courses and when I switched my class from Psychology to Liberal arts (her idea) then she seemed a bit more relaxed.

I don't think it was the idea of me coming to school, it was what I signed up for. She doesn't want to see a colored woman get a higher paying job than herself. This is Rochester, NY. They have so many lawsuits based on racial discrimination, I've read into it and it is unbelievable on how many cases were won and the people who sued, took their families and moved out as far as it could take them.

We had a group of black contractors who were raised here and were mistreated by their white coworkers for years. Despite the fact these men worked just as hard as the white men. When they tried reporting this to their boss they were fired and blown off. So they sued, it took three years but they each won a 1 million dollars.

Another one was a black child who was gifted and wanted to attend an all white school in Irondequiot and was told she could, but then the superintendent of the school district told her no and even made excuses for a solid year saying it was full. Come to find out they had three slots open and some teacher from the school called her to tell her the slot was available. When the mother tried calling the supt. on the slot, they told it was not available. That is when the mother filed a lawsuit...and guess what? she won...took her daughter to another gifted school in another state and never looked back. Oh and this was in Greece, NY.

When I told A about this information he looks at me like I'm nuts and dumb. He said, We live all the way up that holds any value. So what? White racism is everywhere. It doesn't matter.
Oppression was a serious thing in the 30's and still is. He is not educated and does not know anything about the town he grew up in. First of all, when he ordered wings from Pontillos instead of saying, "A" Turhan it said, "A" Turhass"on his food. Ad his family still orders from there. I told him, what if they spit in your food? He is so dumb. I told him, wake up and realize you'll never be white. If he goes in the sun he tans really nice...he won't do it. I know why. He is afraid he'll look middle eastern. It is so sad how this town tries to break people down.

It has so much potential and such an opportunity to be a up growing city. But because racism is still hardcore they'll always be a forgotten town. There are so many cases of racism here. I am on the verge of filing for a lawsuit myself. I rather walk away with money enough to stabilize myself somewhere comfortably back home and get my education there. 

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

When will you grow up

I often wondered what will it take to get a full male adult to grow the fuck up. I am at a point now where yelling is the norm for me. I am at my wits end with this fool. I have so much on my plate right now and only because I am trying to establish a future for myself. I cannot and will not drag trash along with me. I don't understand how he could make my personal issues about himself. If I have to take care of transcripts, immunizations and I am having some roadblocks or some huffing to do and stressed out about that then having to deal with him whining like a five yr old about me being a bitch?! I am a bitch about bills. I am a bitch about wanting my house clean. I am bitch for wanting him to take showers and comb his hair. We don't even live together. He gets angry when I don't say, "I love you." I won't say it, because I don't mean it! I can see this is going to get ugly. It is not one of those relationships where the guy just calls it quits and moves on. No, he literally cannot get the idea that he is a piece of glass in the bottom of my foot that has infected and now is turning into gangrene.

I am going to try my hardest to bury myself in my books and make excuses not to be home so I don't have to deal with him. I am going for single for a long time. I don't want to hitch onto anyone from this puny town. The troubles I have gone through just to get my Admissions application submitted was a pain in the ass. Information was misguided and so far from accurate that the woman I'm referring to in reference to giving falsified information should go BACK to college to learn some common communication skills. Then we have a lady in the F.A department who likes to give her two cents on who should receive F.A and who shouldn't based on her perceptions of self worth.

That is Rochester for you. In a nutshell, in a box, in a circle...that loops itself around its own neck..repeatedly. They overanalyze EVERYONE....and then when directed on it, they deny it wholeheartedly saying," you're causing problems for them"Arguing is constantly the way to get things done around here. You have to go OUTSIDE of Rochester to get the PROPER information on some simple, basic guidelines on how things are SUPPOSED to be done. If people just did their jobs you would be able to live a smooth transition and possibly bring up the economy here.

Going to a College in Rochester is like Deathrow, you know you're gonna go down, you just don't know when. simple as that.

Dating men here is like looking for a cheap job in the paper, you don't know if you should take it, but you do it because you have nothing else. Bad experiences one after the next. Called CT for some info on some things and got nothing but pure courtesy. And I sure miss that. I definitely want to go home I am two seconds from just leaving and starting over there.

I also noticed that business's lie about the laws of education here in Rochester. The law is the same here as everywhere else. Education is for all. Not just for honkie dorie whites. I was told a few years back I was not allowed to take a GED test WITHOUT going for a class. Found out today by the U.S Dept of Ed that was a lie. I could've taken the test as many as three times a year without going for a class. I passed everything but the math course by three points. This town is a DESIGNED for oppression and fail. They will keep any colored,hispanics and poor persons from entering their work fields or colleges.

I had one of my stupid boyfriend's buddies (43 yrs old and hangs out at a community college)
say to me, "hey you could get a job" (I do...but...) He doesn't work either. and hangs out with 20 and 30 yr olds at a local college. And sits there with confidence while he has holes in his sneakers and lives with his parents. Go figure. That is the mentality here in Rochester. I wouldn't be caught dead outside with holes in my sneakers. I am very presentable and keep myself very up kept and tidy. I was raised by HUMANS not farm animals.

I'll also tell you how twisted this place is. Had a middle eastern fat guy call me a gorilla when I weigh about 400lbs less than him and twice as tall and lighter than him. I thought that was hysterical. I look back and go, EW. I would have NEVER given him the time of day. He is NOT my type! But this town will make you settle for the grossest thing. 

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

DC Universe online gaming/ Cheat codes

For those of you who stumbled across my blog in high hopes for finding cheat codes to decipher everyone else's hard work of're sadly mistaken. I am here to write about people who use cheat codes to get to the top without any hard work. I use a Ps3 not a PC to play. Well I got two people so far who attacked me in Villain mode using cheat codes and I AM PISSED. Like, I'm a LVL 30 moderate. I worked my ass off to get there. I have an EX boyfriend who I'm paying 15 bucks a month for his membership and all he does is sit there and sleep or go into a different phase to play. I need hard workers dedicators to this sport. It is a sport of competition and I am competitive and a sore loser. But when you CHEAT I will scream you out on it. I will post names of every person I know that uses cheat codes and get your account closed down. 

Sunday, April 1, 2012

What I know now I wish I knew then.

I am now thirty-one years of age and on my way to be thirty two this year, not something I enjoy since my youth is long gone and I am reaching that time in my life where I feel anxious because I have already wasted so much time on the  "would've, could've, should've" So, my loans are consolidated and on my way to School for sure this time. I want to say I have a busy social life, but I don't. I can't keep fighting myself because others disapprove of my anti-social status. I want to learn things from the wise and thoughtful, I don't want to smoke pot, drink and get fuck-faced by random dorm guys. I am passed that age. I skipped some things in my younger years such as College, so when you skip certain things in your life it is called,"potholes". These potholes need to be patched up so I am going BACK and fixing them so the ride should be smooth into the future. It may seem like a fantasy, but it is the truth.

When we go to into society so many things have been built into a system category it is hard NOT to follow it. Without marriage financial gain, support, familial status becomes null and void with the system.  For example, if you need to  file a claim with the courts for let's say, Child support. If you don't have some type of legal binding contract that says, "Hey! I was signed up to be this man's woman and caregiver!" Well then, you have a lot more to lose because the  courts respect Marital binding contracts.,  It is organized, and not sloppy like certain individuals who procreate without a purpose.. Like people of the ghetto. They just lay on their backs and formulate sperm into their uterus without an end. It is sort of a limbo -type experience. Nothing else to them is important but, "Thugs & Drugs, penis, tits and ass. Lots and lots oversized asses.

And so poverty and ignorance share a common thing. Repetition and constant battling of things that don't belong to them. Like black thugs who murder for money and drugs. And robbery of items that don't belong to them. They didn't work for it and so they feel it should belong to them. That my friend, is pure ignorance. Why? Because lack of Education plays a part in those "potholes" I referred to earlier.
Without your education you can expect to live your life like a 60 yr old. Retired, grumpy and miserable.

We have to make choices, understood. But without living to the system put in place we won't have the chance to continue to use our minds to build a great empire. I don't believe that God is some holy apparition who set us out with restrictions I believe we came from a higher place, and to narrow my mind down to a religious restrictive level of thinking, then we have a problem. We were not designed to just think one way.

However we have flaws in our genetic makeup that dissociates with proper thinking. I think when we live by ourselves we begin to build a mental shell that hinders us from building ideas with other people who share similar interest. When we involve ourselves with people who have a lower I.Q in human and psychological understanding it frustrates us and causes us to retaliate whether it is physical or mental.
I personally don't know if people naturally like to upgrade the brain muscle it may give you headaches and feel sort of stirred in the mind, but it works. Your brain will slowly allow new information to be gathered for research and from there you develop your own strategies on whether or not we are good enough to be on the next level. So communication is key to success, and knowledge is power that will
lead us to where we want to be and satisfied.

We have Doctors. All types the other day I came upon discovery that Physicians are protectors of the Human vessel. I found it interesting and fascinating. They're scientist of the Human body is another way I thought of it. They are constantly trying to find new ways to keep us alive longer in our vessels to complete more missions. However, they have not found a way to alleviate black people from self destructing. -_-

Schools are made for the mind, with the help of our life pods, I.E Mother/Father who are suppose to lead us to the Schools to strengthen our brains and keep our vessels healthy to continue missions. Without the proper health our vessels get sick indefinitely and thus preventing us from completing our goals. We develop emotions to help us stay together as we are all the same similar species. But somehow violence and many other forms of side distractions that keeps us from doing so I haven't figured ou why that is, other than spiritual sense, is what keeps us from evolving.  When you have a broken home then failure is a constant domino effect.

For those who do not know what the Domino Effect is I will tell you, it is in relation to physical theory which in my prospective is the most accurate and logical explanation to Human life. And has been proven by many theorist to be so. The domino Effect is a chain reaction that takes place with similar reactions and consistent in relation to the linear sequence. 

Emotional retrospective: 

Now, about love. I used to believe in it so deeply. I used to think it was a place where people bond and become one unconditionally. I thought it was a place where trust is virtue and all those get married and have children and build a foundation together. Love is nothing of what the fairytales tell you, love hurts and will betray you at your weakest time. Love is not about others, Love is you. Love is something you need to give yourself in order to feel comfortable with death. Death and Love are the true soul-mates. Because when you die you have to hold onto yourself and hope the light is there for you when you leave your body. That is love. Without it, you will create chaos, torture, killings and many other things to name.

I know now, Marriage has nothing to do with Love in the way we think. It is about trust and caring.
I know when I say, I love you to someone it has to be real and genuine. When I say I love you it has to mean I love myself also, loving yourself is not selfish. IT is what life is about. When you feel love and feel a sense of warmth within your heart you SHARE it with others. Because you want people to know you mean well. And THAT is love. Not this heart beating fast when you see a guy you like. That is lust and your hormones going saying, YES GIMMIE SOME SPERM!!! LET'S MAKE BAYYYBBIIIES" ....Yeah. I know. No way in hell can you be "in love" with someone you just met. You are infatuated with the guy. Because he is a mystery and mentally stimulates you to want to know more about what he is about. Once you know him, the mystery fades and 9 times out of 10 you're like, "THAT" is what I was huffing and puffing over? So sometimes love grows fondly deep inside for a person whom may have helped you get to a better place in life and supported you emotionally, physically and mentally. Money is not a solution to everlasting fulfillment it just excites you for the moment but is a temporary fix and not a solution to problems in your relationship.